Working Towards Fenian Avenger Second Draft in New Year

The last few months of 2009 were very active for me. In September, I set out with an ambitious goal. I wanted to come up with a completely new concept for a novel, one that didn’t involve an additional book in a series or calling upon my stable of characters and storylines. I wanted to complete the story treatment and outline by November 1^st and participate in NANOWRIMO (National Novel Writing Month). For those not familiar with NANOWRIMO is a non-profit group that encourages writers to set a goal of starting and completing a first draft during the month of November.

That was quite a lofty goal. Assuming that I had a treatment and outline to work with, finishing a first draft is not out of the question. Finishing a draft is historically a very quick process for me. The time consuming (and probably most enjoyable) is the process of developing the treatment and outline. Some concepts of mine take years to get through this process. An idea hits me, and I take months just thinking about it, playing out scenarios in my head, and sometimes having conversations with potential characters in my head Yes, I spend a lot of time talking to myself (people who work with me are more than likely nodding their heads at this).

To do all of this in that short period of September 1^st through November 30^th would be an accomplishment.

To be fair, I did not allow myself to use any ideas I was already working on and I could not use any character that I have ever used before in another book or story.

I wanted to do some kind of adventure story. Something relatively light. I had just finished a story treatment that for In the Mind of Declan Murphy, which is a story about an autistic man who, in his altered vision, can clearly see the devil taking souls in his small Irish town, but he can’t communicate with anyone to warn them. This concept was very deep, spiritual, and abstract. And was quite a downer. I wanted this new story to have energy of its own, as that would help me get through this task.

I came up with the idea of an Irish super-hero, fighting corruption in a fictional depression-ridden Ireland in the form of corporate moguls that have their own vision of what Ireland should and should not be, and fighting the Garda (the Irish police) as they continually shake down the Irish citizens.

It was a fun story to plot. Coming up with an origin that had a mysteriously exceptional boy name Eamon Malone who is part of a new direction in child development and education (and potentially turning him into a weapon). After his parents are killed in an apartment fire after an altercation with the executives at the foundation in charge of educating Eamon, he finds himself alone on the street with only revenge on his mind. After an incident in St. Stephen’s Green where Garda officers are shaking down a woman, Eamon takes on the guise of the Fenian Avenger and dispatches them. He soon is taken in by his friend Angus to live in his subterranean home underneath the streets of Dublin (my own version of a bat cave). The danger of this story treatment is throwing too much into the plot.

I was very pleased that going into the last week of October I had a working story treatment and outline. I was ready to go.

On November 1^st I was off an running. With a detailed treatment and an outline that details signposts and journeys of protagonists, antagonists, and impact characters – the hard part was done. It was just a matter of making time to write. The story took a life of it’s own. I thought of many directions the characters could go, and tightening up the original treatment as I fully worked through some of the scenarios.

Some 63,000 words and thirty days later, I had my goal completed. I had finished the first draft up until the last five chapters. I never do the last five chapters in a first draft. I always like to re-read the draft after a period of time to make sure that the ending I intended to use is still feasible.

It’s a waste of time to set goals to write during the holidays. It just doesn’t lend itself to consistency. And consistency is the key to writing. Writing has to become a habit, and for it to become a habit, it has to be something that you do every day. It’s not enough to be a good writing; you have to practice being a good writer and pushing yourself to better yourself.

So, for the new year I plan to get back into the habit of writing. And events so far in the new year have a way of trying to get in the way of that. In addition to my wonderful weekly gift of chemotherapy to dislodge any momentum I had, I’ve had a flare of my painful conditions that require the chemo, and a case of strep throat that causes me to stop taking my chemo that makes my symptoms get worse.

For the second draft, my goals are: tighten up the plot, flesh out the locations and make them pop, try to get inside the head of a confused sheltered eighteen year old super hero, and adjust the story to get rid of the prologue (a certain publication killer), and a hole in the middle where a plot point didn’t pan out.

Second drafts are my least favorite thing about writing. I’m a lousy editor of my own work and have a habit of thinking my writing is either too good or too bad.

Back to Writing the Fenian Avenger (with a new concept painting)

A combination of a holiday at the beach, the kids crazy fall schedule of events, and health issues at home (and surprisingly, not mine) caused a break in my writing of the first draft of The Fenian Avenger. Perhaps it was a much-needed break. I was stuck on Chapter 34 for weeks.

But, all of that seemed unimportant as my wife Alicia started having some pretty scary symptoms from an irregular heartbeat. She was under a great deal of pressure, probably mostly because of a tennis event she was helping coordinate in Asheville. She was set to leave on a Friday morning, when she came down with this on Thursday night and wound up in the ER (a feat we repeated two days later). Between that and starting the kids on their home school program for the fall (which is more than a full time job in the first place, I’m a major slacker compared to her), that may have enough to raise the stress level to an all-time high. During that time, I scaled back on some things, came into the office a little earlier, got home a little earlier, helped take the kids to afternoon and evening events. We had tremendous help in the form of dinners and help babysitting the kids from our friends at ECPC and JFBC HSG (I feel like the government – that would be East Cobb Presbyterian Church, where we attend, and Johnson Ferry Baptist Church Home School Group, where the kids attend classes and are involved in sports and extracurricular activities. See, that’s too long, and exactly why I abbreviated).

Alicia is doing much better now. I wish I could have taken the last week or so off, as we used almost the last of my vacation time three weeks ago to go to the beach. I think one of the most relaxing holiday’s I’ve had was last year when we were supposed to go to Asheville (you see, it seems to be tied into going to Asheville) when Alicia required emergency surgery. Instead of cancelling the holiday, I just took it at home and took care of her. It was one of the most relaxing holiday’s I can remember (not for her, though).

But, it was nice this time scaling back and not being so busy, watching DVD’s of TV seasons that I picked out (I think she would grade me an A- on Burn Notice, an F on Mad Men, and an incomplete bordering on C- for True Blood). We spend time talking with the kids, talking with each other (Thought, I think she is sick of my stressing about Eamon Malone and the Fenian Avenger and that lousy Chapter 34 that won’t finish).

Now, I’ve returned to writing the Fenian Avenger now. And the break was just what the doctor ordered. As usually the case with me, I lose sight of what the first draft of a novel really is: A rough start-to-finish treatment of your book, if the moment leads you to write prose and dialogue, then go for it, otherwise terse explanations of what is happening in that passage or chapter will suffice.

Chapter 34 was a passage that was critical to the book, and I was becoming entrenched in the description of what was going on when it wasn’t truly necessary. The Fenian Avenger is a story in which a fictional current time Ireland that is mired in a deep depression in which one of the few industries that actually turns a profit is that which caters to Irish-Americans finding their roots. These people (that I am one of, though only a generation removed from being an Irish citizen) are often called Plastic Paddies, and desire to see the Ireland of their fantasies with happy Irish people dancing and signing in shiny green clothes. This Ireland is full of corruption in government as well in the police force, which is not called the police, they are the Garda (pronounced GAR-ad-ee), which is short for Garda Síochána na hÉireann, which is Gaelic for Guardians of Ireland.

Eamon Malone is a boy that was raised by a juggernaut corporation in Ireland called KOD, lead by the charismatic Kieran O’Dowd. Eamon is off the charts in IQ, physical activities, and artistic sense. His education and training are part of the mysterious Sons of Ireland by KOD. Eamon has parents, his father is a detective in the Garda, but it’s KOD that calls all the shots. When his father learns that Eamon is being trained in combat and how to kill, he threatens to pull his son out of the program. Well, what would any large corporation do in this case? Well, of course, remove the parents from the picture.

When this happens, Eamon escapes the training facilities. Angry and alone, he vows revenge against KOD and Kieran O’Dowd for parents. He meets up with enterprising Angus Shannon, a computer and electronics genius, and fellow Kieran O’Dowd hater. Angus wants revenge because KOD killed his parents and stole their scientific breakthrough which was the most complex and complete mapping and study of the human DNA (as Eamon learns this, warning bells go off in his head). Angus is limited in his pursuit of Kieran O’Dowd as the accident that killed his parents left him paralyzed in a wheelchair.

Together with Eamon’s fighting skills and Angus’ technology and hacking into every system, Eamon becomes the Fenian Avenger, fighting Garda corruption against the Irish people and hero of Ireland.

Okay, that sounds a little comic book-ish, but the more complete concept is quite long to go into. Thus, I really have to work on my 60-second elevator speech and query letter pitch for this book by the time it’s done.

Chapter 34 is right in the middle. It’s the crucial scene where the Fenian Avenger breaks into KOD corporate headquarters, which is secured the max like a fortress. Eamon and Angus were also forced to use the help of John Q, a former Sinn Fein lieutenant, who was able to get them access to the building in the form of an employee ID. Unfortunately, John Q used the Fenian Avenger smokescreen to steal company secrets on mergers and was able to profit by short-selling KOD stock.

Once inside, he discovers important clues about what Kieran is up to, and who is really is. Using Angus’ help, he is able to get by all the security systems. However, he misses one off-line security measure in Kieran’s office, a video camera that is motion activated and tied into an isolated computer. And it captured perfect images of the Fenian Avenger breaking into Kieran’s office and rifling through the files. Oops. Between that, and the evidence that someone stole inside information on a merger, that made the Fenian Avenger look like a criminal, rather than a hero.

Once this chapter was done by first draft standards, I was able to roll along and rip off another few chapters over the weekend.

I even revised an earlier concept image of the Fenian Avenger. Initially I was uncertain as to what he was going to look like, and the first image he had a fancy cape. I started to think to myself that this is a depression-era Ireland. I changed the cape for a long coat, and I think this makes a big difference. The Fenian Avenger is not a TV hero, he stays in the shadows, and he only reason he wears a mask is that he doesn’t want the Garda’s facial recognition software to spot him (as KOD is still searching for the lost Eamon Malone to finish creating the next generation of Irish men).

The Story of The Fenian Avenger

My current literary project, titled The Fenian Avenger, found its beginnings in an unusual way for me. (by the way, the blog painting is a concept drawing as one of the scenes from this book)

Looking back on my completed projects, such as The Code of the Eight and The Trinity Covenant came out of the mythology and story of an agent code-named Diablo. The books chronicled his beginnings as an FBI sleeper inside organized crime, his infamous rise through the intelligence community, and his culmination with his involvement in the Project Integrity organization. Diablo and his stories came from a high-level concept that brewed over time.

Other books, such as the one I am editing at the moment The Franklin Castle, tells the story that had its beginning in a real life event in which I spent the night in one of the most haunted places in the world (Cleveland’s Franklin Castle) as part of a college scientific paranormal investigations unit. By the way, nothing happened to me that night in the house. The idea germinated with me for years to tell the story of people who go to a similar event at the Franklin Castle, with a scientific team that discounts the idea of personal experience. I even found a way to slip Diablo from my other books in (he never was allowed to have this much fun saving the world, so here he gets to help two teenagers solve the mystery of the house).

But, in The Fenian Avenger, I did something completely different. I had no idea what I was writing about prior to the first day I sat down and starting story forming. I let the roll of the dice determine theme and signposts and nature of the protagonist and antagonist. I had in my mind that I wanted to do a story about a superhero. Beyond that, I had nothing.

After a long weekend of hurricane outlining, I had the semblance of the treatment of a book. At a simple level, it was the story about a boy in an alternative version of Ireland, where there is great poverty and depression, and where the government and police (called the Garda Síochána na hÉireann, meaning the Guardians of Ireland or just Garda) is corrupt. His father is an inspector in the Garda, and has been warned off putting any more heat on a billionaire Irish businessman. In exchange for his cooperation, a Garda foundation offers to assist the inspector and his wife have a child, with the condition that the Foundation be allowed to educate and train him. From that beginning, Eamon Malone was born.

From a young age, Eamon is special. His intelligence is off the charts. Not only his logical and reasoning skills amazing, but also his artistic ability is incredible, playing Chopin at the age of three. Physically he is bigger and stronger than any other boy his age, besting his instructors by the age of ten.

As years go by, his father is still ridden with guilt over compromising his morals in return for this son. He learns that his son is being taught combat skills, and is concerned that the Foundation has engineered a weapon and not a boy. He attempts to pull Eamon out of the Foundation.

The act proves his downfall, for him and his wife disappear, leaving Eamon a ward of the state. As the Foundation attempts to come in scoop him up, Eamon escapes and hides with the aid of his friend Angus, who is confined to a wheelchair and lives a recluse life in an underground mansion and has illegal access to all important government computer systems. Angus, like Eamon, has a distaste for the corruption as the downfall of his parents were at the hand of the same corporate mogul that lost Eamon his family.

Together, they become the Fenian Avenger. Eamon the brawn, Angus the eyes.

As the weeks went by, and I spent more time with the treatment, I was able to add more back stories and character development to turn this into something more interesting (I hope) than a comic book.

Recently, I finished the first draft of the first part of the book (there are four parts in all). And I’m very pleased. My first drafts are not readable, but the starting of a brief narrative telling of the story. It’s meant to be simple, as I will often change critical elements and have to go back and change previous chapters.

As a writer, you often get mired in “downer” chapters. These are chapters that are important in advancing your story, but by themselves are not very interesting and often get chopped out and referred to in a flashback or dialogue. I’m three chapters into the second part, and I’m at one of those chapters. Suddenly, it’s not interesting to write this story and I’m not excited to get to lunchtime so that I can write a little more. It’s agony, and it causes me to adjust things in previous chapters (for the better of the book), but that’s work that takes away your forward momentum. I’ve been on the same chapter for a week, and I am so over it.

It is my goal to be done with this chapter by mid-week this week, and that is why I’m writing this. I want to move on to interesting chapters with the Avenger gets into danger attempting to find all important clues.